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  • widmerpool
    Senior Member
    • Nov 2010
    • 151

    Originally posted by Faust View Post


    Thatcher and her ilk are the main culprits here. You cannot keep on destroying the middle class and driving people into poverty, not affording them an opportunity for a decent life while enriching the already rich and not expect this. I won't be surprised if similar riots break out in the US.
    I realize this is an easy impression for a foreigner to get from the media, but it is total bullshit. The UK was a shithole in the 1970s. Things could have gone either way in the 90s, but Labour picked up all the worst aspects of what the Tories left behind, accelerated the destruction of the education system and pursued tax and social policies that reduced social mobility and entrenched the underclass.
    http://asteroidanxiety.bandcamp.com

    Comment

    • MetroBulotDodo
      Senior Member
      • Oct 2010
      • 1312

      post moved from What Are You Wearing Today

      Originally posted by zamb View Post
      my original argument is that marriage is as old as human civilization, and as long as human beings exist there will always be the need to marry.

      I am not saying we cannot lived without or never lived without the institution or different forms of it. I am saying the institution is as old as human civilization itself and will continue to exist because human being will always have the desire to do so,
      Amidst the failures of the institution in modern society there is no greater pledge that one can make to a person they love and want to be with than the pledge of marriage...........
      There's a lot in here to address, but I'll keep this one, um, relatively short (no promises.) Marriage may or may not be as old as human civilization - frankly, we'd never know simply because there is no way to determine, in the long history, of non-record keeping civilizations, if a ritual we would recognize as "marriage" existed. I think Z, your insistence that "it must be old as human civilization" comes from a reasonable intuition: that marriage was a ritual that was put into place and continually practiced in certain societies because for them, it did important work in practice. Marriage -- and in particular, the actual ceremony itself - makes "visible" a network of mutual obligations that are established at the moment of marriage. It also works to regenerate that particular social order, reminding us of obligations we may have, past and present. In certain societies, the obligations that come into being through weddings serve as proxy for a legal system. In fact, it's frequently as formal as any legal system that is codified, for example, that one must do this or that if your wife abandons the household of the mother-in-law and leaves for another village, etc etc.

      That said, it's crucially important to remember that "love", "vows", "marriage" and "weddings" are socially and historically specific. As Fuuma noted, we can't assume that any of those categories *are* simply because they must *be*. Unless you're outside of society (and I promise you, you aren't), you've chosen to live alongside a group of people with whom you've agreed to, at the very least, basics in a particular social contract. Our modern, western (Northern Atlantic) social contract through which we operate happens to be one in which there is a multitude of options for pairings, including poly pairings. It in no way suggests a decline of "values" - I think the most we can say is that modernity in (Western) society allows for a differing set of possibilities when it comes to marriage or commitment because marriage doesn't do the *social* work that it once did. We have a legal system in place so that if someone kills your husband, your mother's nephew doesn't have to enact revenge. Given our geographic mobility, and emphasis on the "individual" (so annoying) we are no longer as implicated within a set of kin obligations as we may have once -- for reasons fine and good -- been.

      It's pointless not to "believe in marriage." It's a socially constructed practice that mediates between sets of social orders -- and practiced where it is desired and/or does "work". As such, it's a simple reality that is, and like, for example, the monarchy, you have to decide if it is a practice that means something to you...if it's not, then don't switch on to watch the royal wedding, as it were.

      It seems some of us are complaining over how this particular ritual has become commoditized...that's a whole 'notha thing, I'll skip. What does this have to do with what tbone is wearing at the wedding? If you are close enough to be invited, I would hope it would be understood by the couple that you're there to that you feel a sense of obligation to them. And here's the magical thing: so long as you know the couple and know that they'll allow for broader interpretation of the dress code,you can still convey the seriousness of your sense of mutual obligation with them whilst wearing drop-crotch shorts. Also, they're tailored(?)

      OK, so that was long, but I haven't done that in forever so I'm gonna use my bi-annual license to expound, alright?

      MBD

      p.s. If you could see CJ's wife, I'm many of you would suddenly be very into the idea of marriage. Heh.
      "To articulate what is past does not mean to recognize 'how it really was.'
      It means to take control of a memory, as it flashes in a moment of danger."

      -Walter Benjamin. Thesis VI, Theses on the Philosophy of History
      My rarities and quotidian garments for sale thread. My tumblr and eBay page.

      Comment

      • semper
        Senior Member
        • Feb 2009
        • 132

        Allow me to note that this argument was about the meaning of weddings.
        Zamb turned it into the meaning of marriage, which is quite a different discussion.

        And allow me, MBD, to state that the comparison to monarchy is rather poor. Simply because it exists, you can't be for or against it?
        sicut lilium inter spinas

        Comment

        • ProfMonnitoff
          Senior Member
          • Jan 2007
          • 556

          Personally, I wouldn't wear the outfit that sparked this discussion to any of the weddings I've been to/will go to soon, simply because I don't think any of the couples would have appreciated it. Think what you will about marriage (I still haven't made my mind up about it to be honest - I certainly want a monogamous relationship and children somewhere down the road though), a wedding is about the two people who are celebrating their love and dedication for each other. If they're the type who would be fine with me wearing drop crotches/sissy pee/etc to a wedding I'd consider it, until then I'll wear 'boring' suits, because a wedding isn't about my 'individuality' or whatever. I'd show up in just about anything if it made the couple appreciate the day more, just as I hope people would for my wedding.

          But if the outfit was seen as appropriate for the event by the newly weds, then it's all good of course.
          Originally posted by jogu
          i went out to take garbage out and froze my tits runnin down stairs , think im gonna chill at home tonite . hungry tho anyone have cool ideas on what to order for supper , not pizza tho sick of pizza

          Comment

          • Magician
            Senior Member
            • Jul 2008
            • 709

            major plus one to profmonitoff
            Selling badass McQueen topcoat 48/38/M. I also write and tweet.

            Comment

            • BSR
              Senior Member
              • Aug 2008
              • 1562

              MBD: do you really think the highly theoretical concept of social contract has any relevance to describe actual social mechanisms?
              pix

              Originally posted by Fuuma
              Fuck you and your viewpoint, I hate this depoliticized environment where every opinion should be respected, no matter how moronic. My avatar was chosen just for you, die in a ditch fucker.

              Comment

              • AKA*NYC
                Senior Member
                • Nov 2007
                • 3007

                bsr you need to stop making intelligent statements under that avatar. it's so silly i can't square it with the philosophical musings no matter how hard i try haha.
                LOVE THE SHIRST... HOW much?

                Comment

                • casem
                  Senior Member
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 2590

                  Excellent post MBD. I posted a long thing about marriage in some thread awhile ago, but I can agree with most everything you say.

                  As a "gay", my feelings are a bit mixed about marriage for myself. On one hand, I think far too many resources are poured into the marriage equality fight when there are more important battles to be fought (economic inequality, bullying/harassment, rights to housing/healthcare). On the other, I think it is a nice right to have for those who want to have their relationship validated in a traditional way whatever the gender of the couple.

                  It's funny because the right wingers are against gay marriage just as much as the far left queer radicals which drives me crazy (we have enough problems without undermining our own movement...).

                  At the same time, having just ended a four year relationship with someone who I thought I might spend the rest of my life with, the idea of marriage sounds kind of nice. I think the next guy I will ask if he's into being legally bound to me forever, because I can't take another breakup
                  music

                  Comment

                  • jogu
                    Senior Member
                    • Jun 2009
                    • 1601

                    idk if i like the idea of bein with someone for life , i mean like in a non friend way . and i def dont like livin with someone forever either . i reeeeeally fuckin hate feelin like i need to sometimes watch what i do etc like if im playin xbox all nite and then its all " what are u still fuckin up playin games ? " . i hate that shit so much , at 1st i feel bad like fine fine ill turn it off and then a minute later when im turnin the lites off i get pretty angry instead like jesus fuckin christ i should be able to do w /e the hell i want

                    if its just sex man u can get that anywhere so dont rly need to marry someone for that . cant rly think of anything else that makes gettin married worth it , easier to be single OR just date someone but keep it as dating and not marriage . noooooo maam

                    Comment

                    • AKA*NYC
                      Senior Member
                      • Nov 2007
                      • 3007

                      ^ best of sz
                      LOVE THE SHIRST... HOW much?

                      Comment

                      • Farkhanyassin
                        Senior Member
                        • Jan 2010
                        • 693

                        My brother has 4 children I want 5. My wife better be ready.

                        Okay fine not WANT 5, let's see how many life grants us along the way.
                        MOSLEM PRIEST

                        Comment

                        • lowrey
                          ventiundici
                          • Dec 2006
                          • 8383

                          Originally posted by jogu View Post
                          idk if i like the idea of bein with someone for life , i mean like in a non friend way . and i def dont like livin with someone forever either . i reeeeeally fuckin hate feelin like i need to sometimes watch what i do etc like if im playin xbox all nite and then its all " what are u still fuckin up playin games ? " . i hate that shit so much , at 1st i feel bad like fine fine ill turn it off and then a minute later when im turnin the lites off i get pretty angry instead like jesus fuckin christ i should be able to do w /e the hell i want
                          life is tough man.
                          "AVANT GUARDE HIGHEST FASHION. NOW NOW this is it people, these are the brands no one fucking knows and people are like WTF. they do everything by hand in their freaking secret basement and shit."

                          STYLEZEITGEIST MAGAZINE | BLOG

                          Comment

                          • lowrey
                            ventiundici
                            • Dec 2006
                            • 8383

                            Originally posted by MetroBulotDodo View Post
                            It's pointless not to "believe in marriage." It's a socially constructed practice that mediates between sets of social orders -- and practiced where it is desired and/or does "work". As such, it's a simple reality that is, and like, for example, the monarchy, you have to decide if it is a practice that means something to you...if it's not, then don't switch on to watch the royal wedding, as it were.
                            Agreed. It makes perfect sense that marriage is not for everyone, but the concept of "not believing in it" has always seemed weird to me. Since I got married I've actually had a couple of people rant to my face how they don't get marriage or don't somehow believe in it. I've told them that if you don't get it, you probably don't have any reason to get married and thats fine, but this shouldn't be generalized in either direction.
                            "AVANT GUARDE HIGHEST FASHION. NOW NOW this is it people, these are the brands no one fucking knows and people are like WTF. they do everything by hand in their freaking secret basement and shit."

                            STYLEZEITGEIST MAGAZINE | BLOG

                            Comment

                            • Fade to Black
                              Senior Member
                              • Sep 2008
                              • 5340

                              yeah that wasn't best of sz it's just self conscious youth.
                              www.matthewhk.net

                              let me show you a few thangs

                              Comment

                              • Faust
                                kitsch killer
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 37852

                                Originally posted by lowrey View Post
                                Agreed. It makes perfect sense that marriage is not for everyone, but the concept of "not believing in it" has always seemed weird to me. Since I got married I've actually had a couple of people rant to my face how they don't get marriage or don't somehow believe in it. I've told them that if you don't get it, you probably don't have any reason to get married and thats fine, but this shouldn't be generalized in either direction.

                                Are you serious? Wow.
                                Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months - Oscar Wilde

                                StyleZeitgeist Magazine

                                Comment

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