What are you wearing today?

[Sombre]

these days I don't give a damn.
I wear whatever, whenever to wherever.................if you don't want me like that, then don't invite me.......Im just tired of all of these empty and meaningless social norms.

I went to a friends funeral last Monday and I wore drop Crotch tucked into CCP boots with a white Linen shirt untucked and a Blazer. dare anyone say anything to me................I am there to pay my last respects to a great friend who had lived a full life, and what does it matter what i wear?

This is exactly how I feel. There is no point and no logical reason for most social customs. What I wear has nothing to do with anyone else. It seems silly that someone should be offended by something I do that has nothing to do with them.

[Johnny]

I find it interesting that the "other people's reactions..." thread is full of stories of woe about horrible people calling posters horrible names because of their beautiful clothes, yet this one if full of comments about "other" people being the great unwashed, lower forms of life, repulsive etc.

[Faust]

the idea that weddings are about the bride (and groom) only, and that it is "her (their) special day" and all eyes should be on her (them) is a myth created by repulsive baby boomers for repulsive baby boomers to justify the displays of consumption common at their weddings, which, let's face it, are attempts by the bride and her barren mother at recreating the weddings they see in movies and magazines, which are in turn pale imitations of royal weddings in europe and the traditions that surround them. it's petit bourgeois specimens trying to claw their way up from vulgar middle class life, hoping that tuile and pink roses and personalized stationery will do the trick. both the bride from new jersey and the princess from wales can go fuck themselves.

weddings are about the guests. a wedding is not a wedding if friends and family don't show up. a wedding is merely a confirmation in the eyes of those close to us that the love is true and lasting and of importance to everyone. that's been the case with similar social bonding ceremonies throughout anthropological history.

that uncanny feeling that brides and grooms get when everybody is looking at them take their vows? that hyper-self-aware quasi-out-of-body feeling? that's a sign that their feelings don't really matter at the moment. they are on display for others, because weddings are about the guests. similarly, the theater is not for and about actors: the theater is oriented toward the audience.

so: wear a drop-crotch suit to a wedding. brides who think that the focus should be on them alone have a long life of bourgeois striving ahead of themselves and are better left alone in their moment of glory, which will soon give way to crippling personal dissatisfaction.

Hats off

[Faust]

Off topic, but truer words have never been spoken.

[Mail-Moth]

I find it interesting that the "other people's reactions..." thread is full of stories of woe about horrible people calling posters horrible names because of their beautiful clothes, yet this one if full of comments about "other" people being the great unwashed, lower forms of life, repulsive etc.

Indeed

[Fuuma]

if someone asked me to wear an indian woman's outfit to a wedding i'd reconsider the friendship
point is still valid though, and even extends beyond attire though we can leave it at that here.

I knew someone would notice , hey I just used the most extreme example possible to make a point...

[cjbreed]

...your cousins 50 year old step dad tries to finger one of the bride's maids while a bunch of moms pole dance...

when i am 50, i hope i am successful in this endeavor

[copacetic]

so the bride and groom want "traditional"? what does that even mean?

well, nowadays it means the style of wedding popularized by queen victoria and her cousin/husband prince albert of saxe-coburg. victoria's grandfather was king george iii, who is cheerfully commemorated in the declaration of independence, in which george is accused of "destroying the lives of [the american] people." george iii's father, king george ii, was a notorious philanderer and warmonger. prince albert's parents, though not as contemptible as victoria's, were also spiritually bankrupt. duke ernest i divorced his wife louise, the mother of his two children, after he was unfaithful to her. louise died of cancer in shame and obscurity at age thirty.

such are the contributions to the institution of marriage that the corrupt, incestuous houses of hanover and saxe-coburg-gotha offer us, along with the aesthetic trappings of the "traditional" wedding.

***

only in the affluent west would a wedding guest be told with great specificity what to wear and how to wear it, and moreover, still decide to attend the wedding of such a blatant egotist after being so condescended to. historically (looking far back), it has been precisely the other way around: the bride and groom are obligated to dress according to customs that are, in a way, "enforced" by the attendees, all of whom play a part in organizing and planning the wedding on behalf of the couple.

***

such is the sad state of our culture. sadder yet is that very few are willing to question the institutions that sit--bloated and obsolete--right in front of our eyes. the historical development of the modern wedding lays bare the desires behind it: mimicry of european royalty, bourgeois class-signaling, and (to me) a rather moving existential search for strong social bonds in a society that asks its members to sideline them in favor of more productive pursuits.

***

and still: a man is told not to wear shorts to a wedding because he might not "match" the "vision" of its planners!

and so, to all of these happy bride(groom)s-cum-wedding-planners who are looking forward to their sci-fi-themed destination weddings, i hope that you and your klingon-impersonating facebook friends have a great time together at the reception.

[cjbreed]

you're such a romantic

[syed]

You should see Indian weddings - people turn up in all sorts of sparkly, loud, attention-grabbing weirdness. But it all just adds to the fun really

[Johnny]

Thanks copacetic, I've told people multiple times why I don't want to get married. From now on I will just link to your two posts.

To coing a phrase, "Seriously"? You don't want to get married becuase some people have shit weddings?

[Servo2000]

I think he's just saying that's a symptom of a bankrupt institution he's not interested in upholding.

[endorphinz]

while it may not be your thing (or mine either), some people spend their whole pre-married life dreaming of an obnoxious, pretentious, vulgar affair to celebrate their nuptials. Don't judge them....and don't attend if their misplaced extravagance bothers or offends you; just respect their desires/wants/dreams and wish them good luck and happiness....and hope they'll have enuf $$$ to do it again......and again......and again.

[Sombre]

only in the affluent west would a wedding guest be told with great specificity what to wear and how to wear it, and moreover, still decide to attend the wedding of such a blatant egotist after being so condescended to. historically (looking far back), it has been precisely the other way around: the bride and groom are obligated to dress according to customs that are, in a way, "enforced" by the attendees, all of whom play a part in organizing and planning the wedding on behalf of the couple.

***

such is the sad state of our culture. sadder yet is that very few are willing to question the institutions that sit--bloated and obsolete--right in front of our eyes. the historical development of the modern wedding lays bare the desires behind it: mimicry of european royalty, bourgeois class-signaling, and (to me) a rather moving existential search for strong social bonds in a society that asks its members to sideline them in favor of more productive pursuits.

Thanks copacetic, I've told people multiple times why I don't want to get married. From now on I will just link to your two posts.

Are you boys going to be at the magazine launch next month? I'd like to buy each of you a drink.

while it may not be your thing (or mine either), some people spend their whole pre-married life dreaming of an obnoxious, pretentious, vulgar affair to celebrate their nuptials. Don't judge them....and don't attend if their misplaced extravagance bothers or offends you; just respect their desires/wants/dreams and wish them good luck and happiness....and hope they'll have enuf $$$ to do it again......and again......and again.

But what is the point of such a celebration? It seems to me that these people are showing off more than anything else, and I find that detestable.

Maybe we should take a break to watch Bridezillas and then resume the conversation.

[zamb]

Alright I'm busy
but let me take all comers here, and chop this madness down to size..........

While I 100% agree with everything Copacetic said (i told my wife if I ever were to have a marriage ceremony again i would only have family and a few friends rather than the gaudy affair we had)

but it is to be made clear that a wedding ceremony and a marriage are two different things, and one needn't have a ridiculous wedding ceremony in order to have a wonderful marriage

the idea that the institution of marriage is outdated is bull crap, marriage had been around since the existence of human beings, and so long as human being exist there will be a need for marriage.